Rusty, a 1985 Toyota Corolla long past its prime, completed a 30-kilometre round trip earlier this week, much to the surprise of its sceptical owner and several doubtful onlookers.
The Corolla, notorious for emitting more smoke than a 1980s blue-light disco machine and rattling like a maraca during an earthquake, managed to navigate the Calder Highway and regional backroads. Witnesses said the exhaust system appeared to be held together with nothing more than hope and layers of duct tape.
“We figured it would be more of a rescue mission than a road trip,” owner Phil Henderson said. He admitted he has not performed basic maintenance on the vehicle since the Hawke government. “I didn’t think it would survive the Calder without exploding into rusty shrapnel. But here we are. Alive. And back.”
The trip included tense moments. About halfway to Maldon, the vehicle began making noises described as “haunted house adjacent.” Henderson reportedly responded by turning up the radio until it shorted out, leaving only the sound of looming mechanical failure.
Visibly shaken but elated after the return journey, Henderson told The Bendigo Standard he “never doubted Rusty for a second,” despite the windshield being secured with zip ties and the driver’s seat resembling a collapsed deck chair.
Henderson said he plans to celebrate the vehicle’s achievement by parking Rusty in his driveway until he can afford to “bribe” a potential buyer. “It’s a legend now,” he said. “People will tell stories about this car for years.”
The legend may soon end after Henderson later discovered Rusty’s registration had expired two years ago.
More to come.
