Residents of Central Victoria are in uproar this week following Qantas' announcement that its early morning Bendigo-Sydney service will be scrapped in favour of a far more convenient lunchtime departure - designed specifically for those who enjoy paying $400 for an airport sandwich before catching the 1:25 pm back home.
The decision has sparked outrage across Central Victoria, with locals furious that they'll now have to spend the night in Sydney or, God forbid, drive to Tullamarine like peasants.
"Our midday service is designed for maximum inconvenience, and the boarding gates change locations daily for fun."
Locals, unwilling to accept the blow, have already begun floating alternatives.
One frustrated executive told us, "The new schedule is so useless, I've started considering constructing a giant helium chair balloon so I can float to Sydney like Gus Gorman in Superman III."
One local told The Bendigo Standard, "I'm not paying $400 for an airport sandwich just to turn around and fly home."
Premier Jacinta from Bendigo has labelled the decision as "disappointing".
